One of my favorite songs is “Dodi Li” by Peter, Paul, and Mary. Their music was the soundtrack of my youth, and “Dodi Li” resonated with me so deeply that it was the song I chose to walk down the aisle to at my wedding. Aside from its beautiful melody, which originates from the Song of Songs, it felt incredibly timely — I got married just two days before the Hebrew month of Elul. The Hebrew letters of Elul — Aleph (א), Lamed (ל), Vav (ו), Lamed (ל) — form an acronym for “Ani L’dodi V’dodi Li” (אני לדודי ודודי לי), meaning “I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine”.
It was a sweet and lovely coincidence that made the song even more meaningful for my wedding.
But did you know that this love-infused verse is also incredibly relevant to the Hebrew month of Elul? Elul, which began today, is the last month of the Jewish year and marks the formal beginning of the High Holiday season — perhaps the most important period in the Jewish calendar. So what do loving relationships have to do with this month, and how do they connect to the High Holidays in general?
The High Holidays begin on the first day of the Hebrew month of Tishrei, typically falling in September or October. Rosh HaShanah, the Jewish New Year, kicks off this festive month, followed by Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement. Then comes Sukkot, the Festival of Booths, and finally Shemini Atzeret and Simchat Torah, which mark the conclusion of Sukkot and the celebration of completing the annual cycle of reading the Torah. It’s a lot to keep track of! However, the days leading up to these holidays, including the month of Elul, are considered incredibly meaningful and auspicious.
The phrase “Ani L’dodi V’dodi Li” captures the spirit of Elul. Rather than seeing this period as one solely of solemnity, the Song of Songs invites us to view it through the lens of love. Elul is traditionally considered a time of Teshuva, or repentance, where we reflect on our actions over the past year and strive to return to our best selves. But it’s also a time to renew and deepen our relationship with God. The phrase reminds us that our bond with the Divine is not based on fear or obligation but on a reciprocal, loving connection — like that of two partners who cherish one another.
One practical aspect of the month of Elul is the recitation of Selichot, prayers asking for forgiveness. These prayers are designed to evoke God’s mercy and remind us of His compassionate nature, always ready to welcome us back.ˆAt the heart of the Selichot prayers are the Thirteen Attributes of Mercy, a set of divine qualities revealed to Moses on Mount Sinai after the sin of the Golden Calf:
These attributes — including compassion, grace, patience, kindness, and truth — tell us who God is. They reveal a God who is not just a distant judge but a loving partner, eager to forgive and embrace us.
Throughout the month of Elul, we repeat these attributes over and over, allowing them to sink into our consciousness. They remind us of the kind of relationship we have with God — one rooted in love and mercy. As we meditate on these qualities, we begin to understand that “Ani L’dodi V’dodi Li” is not just a poetic verse but a real description of our bond with God. Just as in any loving relationship, knowing the qualities of the one we love helps us to connect more deeply with them.
In this way, the Thirteen Attributes serve as a bridge to connect us with God throughout Elul. By repeating them, we are reminded of His forgiving and compassionate nature. If God, who is all-knowing and omnipotent, is always ready to welcome us back with love, how much more should we strive to return to Him with open hearts? It is this understanding that transforms our relationship with God from one of fear to one of love and intimacy.
The idea that “I am for my beloved, and my beloved is for me” is more than just a romantic sentiment. It is a call to action. Elul invites us to view our relationship with God not as a contract but as a dynamic and evolving relationship. God is not only a judge or ruler but also a beloved who desires our presence, connection, and our return. This shift from a fearful relationship to a loving, reciprocal one helps us understand that repentance is not about mere compliance but about deepening our connection with the Divine.
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