Tisha B’Av, the ninth day of Av, marks the saddest day in Jewish history. From the destruction of both Temples to more recent tragedies that coincided with the Hebrew Date in Av, like the Spanish Inquisition and the Holocaust, this day encapsulates centuries of Jewish suffering. As we approach another Tisha B’Av, many of us grapple with a pressing question: In a world already filled with sorrow, how can we meaningfully connect with the profound sadness of this day?
But what if there’s more to Tisha B’Av than just intensifying our grief? What if our tears could have the power to heal, and not just ourselves, but others as well? The biblical figure of Rachel offers us a compelling perspective on this question. Her story, as interpreted by the prophet Jeremiah and elaborated on by Rabbi David Forman, a modern-day Bible Scholar, suggests that the most potent form of mourning isn’t just about personal sorrow—it’s about empathy and healing.
As we explore Rachel’s tears and their significance, we’ll uncover a powerful approach to mourning that not only deepens our connection to Tisha B’Av but also provides a pathway towards reconciliation and hope. Let’s delve into how Rachel’s example can transform our understanding of grief and guide us towards a more empathetic and restorative observance of this solemn day.
The prophet Jeremiah’s portrayal of Rachel illustrates this concept:
This poignant image of Rachel weeping for her exiled children becomes a powerful metaphor for effective mourning. But what made Rachel’s tears so potent?… But what made Rachel’s tears so potent? It wasn’t merely the act of crying but a profound act of empathy and self-sacrifice that Rachel had undertaken in her lifetime. To understand the power of Rachel’s tears, we must look deeper into her story and her relationship with her sister Leah.
But first, when God responds to Rachel’s tears in Jeremiah, He says:
The Hebrew word for “labor” here, “pe’ulah,” echoes a significant moment in Rachel’s life.
This moment, this “labor” is found in the puzzling story of the dudaim, the mandrakes that Reuben brought to his mother Leah. When Rachel asks for some of these flowers, Leah responds harshly, accusing Rachel of taking her husband. Instead of reacting with anger, Rachel makes a surprising decision. She says:
This act, which might seem trivial on the surface, was actually a profound moment of empathy and healing. Rachel, who had been unable to conceive, was willing to give up a night with Jacob to her sister. In doing so, she could see the situation from Leah’s perspective, recognizing her sister’s pain and loneliness.
Perhaps, this moment was a “replay”a reconciliation of som sort from the earlier trauma when Laban, Rachel and Leah’s father had switched Leah for Rachel on her wedding night. By choosing to give Leah this night with Jacob, Rachel was, in a sense, giving retroactive permission and healing the wounds of the past.
This act of empathy and self-sacrifice is what made Rachel’s tears so powerful centuries later. It wasn’t just that she was crying for her children; it was that she had demonstrated the capacity to see beyond her own pain and act with compassion, even towards someone she might have seen as a rival.
The story teaches us that effective mourning isn’t just about expressing our own grief. It’s about the capacity to feel and respond to the pain of others, even in the midst of our own suffering. This is the kind of mourning that has the power to move heaven and earth, the kind of mourning that God responds to.
As we observe Tisha B’Av, we’re called to emulate Rachel’s example. Our mourning should not only express our grief but also motivate us to act with empathy and understanding. Whether it’s reaching out across denominational lines within Judaism or fostering deeper connections within our extended Judeo-Christian community, we all have the power to transform our sorrow into constructive action.
May this Tisha B’Av be not just a day of lamentation, but a catalyst for building bridges and healing ancient wounds, bringing us closer to the day when, as promised to Rachel, all her children will return home. Through our collective efforts, inspired by Rachel’s empathy and action, may we work towards a future of greater understanding, cooperation, and peace.
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